Andrei Ram-On Dharma Yoga Immersion

Where do I OR more importantly, how do I even begin to describe and experience that is nothing short of profound?
I could begin by sharing all the asanas that we did…or the different principles that Andrei shared with us to help make our asanas stronger…and yet, I am not compelled to do that.
What I am moved to write about though is how it is simply amazing it is to meet a person who has so much light in his heart – it literally flows out of him, through the people who encounter him and channels out to the rest of the world.
And how it is in moments like this, when you meet someone with such a true heart, when you really start to become hopeful for the rest of the world. It brings you back to the basic truth that, at the core of our beings as humans…we are all essentially good. We might have forgotten somehow…but it is there…that tiny light that can explode into a supernova of greatness.
And it is this ultimate self-realization which Andrei has shared with us. It is this self-realization which is the ultimate goal of yoga - the Universal Self that is unbounded by ego, by intellect, by the body and by the constructs of the world. He reminded all of us how asanas are really just specks in the greater scheme of “yoga”. That, yes, as I have shared before – yoga is what happens out there. Not on the mat, not in the studio.
It is a way of life.
While I have come out of the workshop, stronger and more confident about inversions and arm balances, this workshop has left my truly inspired. When you are in a place with such wonderful people, who share the same passion, who have so much positive energy – you find that you are transformed. And you feel an energy, a vibe, a light that shines from the heart…it may be as little as a speck…but it is a there…and it spreads… and soon it is like wildfire.
And as I sat during Kirtan, along with my yogi and yogini friends, clapping and singing along, celebrating the goodness of the universe and all living things, and listening to Andrei say his thank you’s, I could not help but look around and notice that people also had tears in their eyes. I guess when the heart knows it has encountered something significant, you are left in awe and your body just naturally wells up with it.
And I knew…right there and then…that we all understood.

ONLY AS STRONG AS MY CORE

Despite the fact that I have been doing yoga for quite some time now, I have only been to yoga core ONCE. For the most part, it’s really only because this class was not offered in my previous studio in Bangkok. And for the lesser part? Well….not sure exactly…it just didn’t catch my fancy somehow.
And yet, as I move through more challenging asanas and inversions and balances, I find myself taking a step back…breathing in and out…and thinking: “This will not work. I need to work on my core.”
And so it is. Without proper core strengthening and really bringing awareness to your core, you will find yourself…wobbling though a lot of the more advanced poses…or getting by but advancing quite slow…or passing through one pose after another and becoming stuck somewhere, somehow.
And so, as I found myself doing the “100s” pose during Shaun’s class yesterday…and feeling the all too familiar burning sensation in my core muscles…I kept on thinking how much stronger I have become and will still be as I continue to build and work on my core.
And it is perhaps not a coincidence when they say that “you are only as strong as your core”. To a certain extent, it is physical and yet greatly metaphysical as well. At the end of the day, it all boils down to the core – to the “core of our being”. That is what defines us… that is where we draw our strength, where we find balance. Without going back to it – we will always be struggling, wobbling, moving and yet never really changing.

ONE MORE TIME IN UPSIDE DOWN

I hate inversions.

Ok, so I have established that in my earlier blog.

But really, I cannot help it.

Everytime I start doing inversions, my head starts to get all fuzzy, my heart skips a beat, my hands start to get clammy and a nagging voice in my heads starts shrieking in panic: “I don’t want to fall!”

So, yes…inversions are not exactly my particular area of strength in my yoga practice. 

Flexibility – yes.  And yeah, arm balances I can still manage to pull off on my good days.  But inversions?!?

And so, it was quite ironic as I found myself in Arun’s Upside Down class last Friday – a class that, as the name implies, basically focuses on just that – INVERSIONS.  And as I entered the studio, I couldn’t help but as myself…

“What the hell am I doing here?” 

But I knew the answer anyway to my own rhetorical question.  I was there because just like everything else, there are some things which just take a bit more practice and effort from our end.  And this was clearly one of those for me. 

And so there I was… feeling awkward and all... right in front of the room. 

And I almost backed out (I had a sudden urge to just bolt right out of the room!)…but I stayed…yes, through the entire 1.5hour class!  And yes, I stayed on (on my head, to be more precise) throughout the 10minute headstands.  And yes, I stayed, through the handstands and the variations.

Hey, I could not do the other poses, nor could I completely tear myself away from the wall, but I was there and I tried.  Maybe that’s enough for now…

And as I ended the class and told Arun how much I really don’t like inversions (I figured my yoga teacher might not like my using the word “hate” to describe inversions :p), he left me with one simple word – practice.  And that’s really all there is to it. 

And somehow, it made sense.  “Practice- all is coming” – as Sri Pattahbi Jois so aptly put it.

And so I will find myself attending more of these inversion classes when time permits.  And while I do not exactly look forward to them, I no longer fear them.  I think that’s a pretty damn good start.

And by the way, I have started doing headstands in my sleep.

And somehow, dreaming has made it easier in the waking.

 

the way of the yogi - part 1 out of i have yet to figure out

A lot of people have asked me what the difference is between yoga and other types of exercise – pilates, for example.  Or stretching for that matter.

So here it is – the big answer (and it’s not really a big secret)

YOGA IS A WAY OF LIFE.

It is not profound as you might think it is.  It is actually quite simple and very practical.  Allow me to explain.

Yoga does not end when you step out of your mat.  Yoga is what happens on and off the mat  On the mat is where you focus and build your practice – but the basic principles of yoga apply in everyday life.  Think of it in the same way that it is in church where you meditate, but it does not mean that you stop worshipping outside of the church , does it?

So, yoga is a lot like that.  Practical applications that you take to your daily life.

Yoga has a lot of principles and different yoga practices might have different expressions of these principles.  The Universal Principles of Alignment are principles taught by Ashtanga Practioners and governs the movement and the correct way of doing asanas.  The concept of “kula” or community is also something that is founded on the Ashtanga teachings. Vinyasa yoga, on the other hand, talks about “flowing” into the poses and aligning breath to movement.  For each inhale and exhale, a corresponding asana.  There is also Hatha yoga which is slower and focuses on the core in each pose. 

As you can imagine, I can go on and on.  But before I do (and overwhelm you with a barrage of information), I have a few yoga principles of my own which I have picked up from the different yoga “schools” of thought.  It is a consolidation of principles I have read, I have picked up from my teachers, I have heard or I have experienced.  So here is the official list of The Principles of the Yogini Monx:

1.  Focus on your breath

Perhaps the simplest and yet the most important principle of yoga which is often forgotten and neglected.

When I first started yoga, I remember my teacher reminding everyone in class to breathe.  And I remember thinking: “Oh, that’s basic.  I mean, how can someone forget to breathe?” .  Well, surprise, surprise.  We do actually. 

Haven’t you ever noticed that everytime we are in  a difficult or stressful situation, we hold our breathe?  Or we hold our breathe in anticipation or in concentration?  And that is what happens in yoga.  When you are new to the practice, you are unfamiliar with the poses, and it is a stress to your body and to your psyche – so unconsciously, you hold your breath.  And you end up dizzy during practice. 

Breathe.  In an unhurried way.  Savor each breathe.  Through the nose, deep into your chest, into your lungs and into your muscles.  That is the proper way to breathe.  Like you are sipping and savoring a really good and expensive glass of wine.  You don’t need to gulp in air or pant heavily.  There is no need to be greedy.  Breathe.  And it will do wonders.

And so it is the same in daily life.  Stress is always there.  As much as we are spiritual beings, we are faced with the challenge of being human.  And we get irritated, we get flustered when things don’t go our way…or we get excited, we get impatient – and in these situations, we forget to breath.

Anger management books would often advise people to count to 5 or 10 slowly if they get pissed before they actually do something or before they even speak.  Ever wonder why?  Breathing increases oxygen to your brain and to your body – increasing clarity and focus.  Allowing you to assess the situation better and hence making you more capable of dealing with it.  Suddenly, everything becomes clear and you are able to focus on what needs to be done.  You are able to focus on your balance, on a pose, on your hunamanasana – and you melt into the pose – you melt into the moment.  And you experience bliss.

2.  Surrender

I read this book a few months back about the 7 Spiritual Laws of Yoga written by Deepak Chopra and David Simon, one of the laws on that book was all about the Law of Least Effort.  This law basically says that “my actions achieve maximum benefit with minimum effort.”  Now what does this really mean?  Does it mean that we should all just have a laissez-faire attitude to everything?  Does this mean that we should not exert efforts into your practice? 

Not really.

What is law actually means (or at least what it means to me), is that we should practice acceptance:  acceptance in what our bodies can and cannot do that day during practice, acceptance of what we are really good at, acceptance of what we still need to work on, acceptance of challenge and acceptance of life. 

Sometimes life is playful , or what we call “lila”, which means a creative play of the divine.  Not everything is in our control.  So we surrender.  We surrender to the beauty of how our bodies our different each time we practice.  We surrender to the surprises that each practice gives us.  We surrender to the wonder of the world we live in.  We surrender to the glorious day we wake up to each morning.    Someone once said (cannot remember who) that yoga is all about mindful surrender.  I like that.

We accept, we surrender and we recognize our defenseless. 

3.  Be fully present

We live in a busy, hectic and stressful world where multi-tasking is expected and is the norm rather than the exception.  There is simply too many things that needs to get done, on top of the things that we want to do – and so we end up cramming everything together.  We try to squeeze in a lot of things in a short amount of time with the thinking that this will help us get the most out of life.

That might make sense from a purely logical point of view.  After all, if you manage to do three things at once, then you have more time to do other things at once, right?  Well, depends on how you look at it.

Whenever we go to our yoga practice, we are asked to leave everything else behind. To empty our thoughts.  We meditate and “empty the cup”.  And there is a perfectly good reason for that.  That time spent practicing yoga is time allotted for that.  Nothing else.  By allowing that time purely for yourself, for your well-being, you end up going out of that practice a more grounded and energized being – ready to take on the world.

Consider the opposite:  You go to yoga, while in meditation you start thinking about what your schedule is after this class, in between asanas you start thinking about that report that you still need to write out, during an asana you begin constructing that report in your head and during savasana you plan what you want to do this weekend.  And so you leave your practice thinking about what exactly was taught during yoga today.

You have cheated yourself and have deprived yourself from another wonderful and unique yoga experience.

We often go on autopilot with a lot of things.  Especially if you have being going to a yoga class quite often.  Especially with yoga practices with a set sequence like bikram or ashtanga.  Especially if there is a lot of work that needs to get done. 

And yet, the truth of the matter is this:  be present.  Wherever you are, whatever you are doing ….you are meant to be there to do just that.  We are not superhuman.  Let us stop kidding ourselves.  We choose to be present, to do something over other things.  And that is the fact. I am writing this blog with the full knowledge that I have chosen writing over let’s say, going out for a drink.  That is the fact.  Imagine how silly it would be for me to be out for drinks on a Saturday night in a club, with a laptop, trying to write down a blog with the blare of music and my friends chatting and dancing in the background.  It simply does not make sense, right?  And yet, we do that often.  In our heads, in our minds. 

Be present.  The Sanskrit word, “Santosha”, literally means “the fragrance of the present.”  And it is fitting that it also a word that is used to mean “contentment”.

Wherever you are and whatever you are doing.  You have made that choice and you might as well get the most out of it.

 

So, there it is.

My first 3 principles. 

The next few ones I will share in another blog lest I run out of things to write about! (eek!)

But I will be sharing some more.

These are in now way thoughts that you need to adhere to as you go about your own yoga practice.  But these are my own guiding principles as I carry on the path of being a yogini in training.

 

 

yoga spirituality

It’s a Sunday…and I am writing about a topic that might be a “touchy” subject for some… or something that others could not really fully understand.

I have heard some people say that they don’t want to go into yoga because of the whole spirituality and meditation aspects of it – that it might put their faith in jeopardy.  And I have friends who have asked and commented on how yoga spirituality conflicts with my Catholic faith – a seeming contradiction with all the Shiva and Ganesh chants (just to name a few).  The answer is quite simple, really -- IT DOESN’T.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I am a firm believer that the road to god and the path of spirituality can have different routes and take different forms.  Faith and spirituality, whichever school of thought it might belong to, all help us become better persons – religion being just part of it. 

As I have grown into my practice, I find that the contradiction between being a Catholic and being a yogini SIMPLY DOES NOT EXIST.  In fact, through the years, what I have realized is that yoga spirituality has helped my religion and faith blossom into something that can be readily applied and seen in my daily life.  It has opened my heart for far greater things – the joy and the rapture of living…of seeing things in a more positive light…of embracing each day with joyous anticipation… of honoring stillness and peace and quite…of welcoming experiences…of respecting and honoring each person…and hoping and wishing for good things to come to others. 

Yoga spirituality has complemented by faith and has fueled the fire inside of me.

It is quite simple really…faith is FAITH.  And we hold on to it regardless…

And so…while I honor the divine, the light, the guru that lies in each of us…so shall I continue to honor the Light, the Divine, the Jesus that I believe in…

WIKIPED-ing "QUINOA"

I chanced upon this interesting looking salad in the Cedele bakery/café near our place called the Quinoa & Chickpea Salad. I was not entirely sure what it was but it looked like a green version of the coucous so I decided to try it out.
I ate it without knowing what it was exactly but how it tasted really caught me by surprise! It was al dente like pasta but had a rich wheaty, grain-like flavour and yet somehow was softly infused with the flavour of the light sauce/seasoning that drizzled the salad. Never mind that it looked weird and “green-y” (literally, since it was green…and my husband thinks it looks weird – worse, he thinks it will start moving anytime! Yuck, not a very appetizing description!) – I was officially hooked from the first moment I tasted it.
So for lack of my own words to describe what it is exactly, in the middle of my meal, I stood up and googled it – or more appropriately, I wikipeed it…so here it goes, folks:

“Quinoa Spanish quinua, from Quechua kinwa, a species of goosefoot (Chenopodium), is a grain-like crop grown primarily for its edible seeds. It is a pseudocereal rather than a true cereal, or grain, as it is not a grass. As a chenopod, quinoa is closely related to species such as beets, spinach and tumbleweeds”

“THE COMMERCIAL AVAILABILITY OF IT THOUGH IS CURRENTLY LIMITED” – the write up said. Just wondering though cause my friend Caroline said I could buy the raw ones from this store in Tanglin Mall…hmmm….must be not so limited after all (or maybe it’s just the case here in Singapore where you can buy almost everything and anything albeit at a cost)

It goes on to say:
"Quinoa originated in the Andean region of South America, where it has been an important food for 6,000 years. Its name is the Spanish spelling of the Quechua name.”

I was very interested to find out though that the Incas considered the crop as sacred.
Now for the good part:
NUTRIONAL VALUE
"Quinoa was of great nutritional importance in pre-Columbian Andean civilizations, being secondary only to the potato, and was followed in importance by maize. In contemporary times, this crop has become highly appreciated for its nutritional value, as its protein content is very high (12%–18%), making it a healthful choice for vegetarians and vegans. Unlike wheat or rice (which are low in lysine), quinoa contains a balanced set of essential amino acids for humans, making it an unusually complete protein source.It is a good source of dietary fiber and phosphorous and is high in magnesium and iron. Quinoa is gluten-free and considered easy to digest. Because of all these characteristics, quinoa is being considered a possible crop in NASA's Controlled Ecological Life Support System for long-duration manned spaceflights.”

Ha! Get that last bit! I can so be an astronaut if this all they get to eat!

So, that’s Quinoa 101 for me from a very reliable source J
I love it! And I think I will be eating more of it. Apart from the fact that it’s healthy, easy to digest and not rice, it is incredibly filling!

Note: By the way, not only does Cedele serve this but it also serves really good organic and healthy food. No trans-fat, organic sugar, grapeseed oil - this is definitely one of my favorite restaurants here in Singapore!
They have a bigger restaurant on Wheelock place but I have seen smaller deli-like or café-like stores in United Square and Novena Square. I know they also have outlets in Millenia Walk, Tanglin Mall, Raffles City just to name a few. Check them out…the food is great!

keeping my tummy happy

My tummy is happy today.

It has not been happy for about a week now and I have been suffering because of it.  

Since I started suffering from tummy problems last November, I had no choice but to cut back and then eventually take out beef, pork, lamb and any other heavy meat from my diet...simply because my tummy has become a sissy and these type of food no longer sit well in my system.

Hence, veggie food exploration it is!  

My husband and I tried this vegetarian restaurant in holland village called original sin (hope the guys don't mind my posting their logo on this blog!)- and it was really really amazing!  the food was superb and absolutely divine... (ironic though that the place is called original sin).  My husband (who happens to be a certified meat-eater) was prepared for an uneventful brunch and was quite prepared to starve through brunch (or drive through mcdonald's after), was pleasantly surprised by the food.  

We started off with the happy mushrooms which was a good portion of portabello mushrooms topped with ricotta cheese, spinach and pesto.  Tomato basil sauce drizzled the top and sides while the pine nuts and mozzarella added just the right touch of mediterranean flavor.  I ordered the bosco misto for my mains while my husband ordered the spaghetti arrabiata.  My dish was a mix of spinach, feta and tofu patties served with sauteed mushroom buttons and asparagus and accompanied by a pleasantly sweet plum sauce.  My husband's arrabiata was far from being the usual pasta fare.  It had a mild base flavor with a sudden burst of rich notes coming through.  I also broke away from my usual water beverage and treated myself to a banana and strawberry smoothie with soy milk (called BLUSH) which made good use of the sweetness of the fruits rather than adding in a heap of sugar.  The brunch was then capped off with a serving of apple crumble with vanilla ice cream and my black coffee.

It was a wonderful wonderful meal and it felt  good to have food that did not fight with my body and it made me feel re energized and ecstatic.

Too bad though we did not bring our cameras along this time (we used to but following the disastrous brunch last sunday, i kindda gave up taking brunch pictures).  But we will be back - maybe after we get that other veggie place a try.

So today, my tummy is happy :)  And i hope it stays that way this week...then again, maybe I have to feed it more of this good stuff :p

the de-tox de-bate

I have been contemplating on signing up for this 7-week detox program that Pure is offering here in Singapore. I have visited (and revisted) the Pure Yoga site for several days (or weeks) now…reading through the program overview…gauging and assessing if I actually had enough balls to actually do it.
And so it has come to the nth time when I am actually seriously considering going for it. It’s difficult, really. Some days I wake up with the firm resolve that, “hey, I am going to do this!”…and some days, I find myself resolved with the fact that, “maybe next time”.
Okay, so what are the reasons for not going for it?
Hmmm….well, for one…it’s not that cheap. And I’m not just being frugal about it…it’s really not something you just jump right into without much thought. Fine – so cost is one thing…but hardly the most important reason.
So that brings me to reason #2 (which is actually quite related to point #1) – if it’s not that cheap and involves a considerable amount of money – then of course the risk is high. If, at any point during the program, I decide that I cannot do it…I would be wasting some hard earned cash!
Finally, I come to reason #3 – the simple reason that I am not sure if I can actually do it. I mean, c’mon, 7 weeks is an awfully long time. And being in the real world during that time – with all the temptations of mouth-watering brunch food, divine desserts and exhilarating cocktails – is not really going to help me a lot on this detox trip. I mean --- can I actually survive it?!?! It’s one thing to be on a detox program in a nice spa, somewhere up in the mountains or by the beach in a nice little boutique hotel or cozy cottage, with 20 other women (or men, to be politically correct) who are there for the exact same reason, with an in-house chef who just cooks all the good stuff and quite another thing to be in the middle of a detox program in the midst of reality, or life as we call it. The thought leaves me feeling like a fish out of water – not very pleasant.
And yet, as I was on the plane to Bangkok, it dawned on me that this detox program was actually how it really is for a yogini in training, right? In the journey to grow deeper into the practice, in learning and growing deeper into yoga, we are not disjointed from our “real lives”. Yoga IS part of our real life. And maybe it is not that easy and it never was. There’s certainly enough reason why “discipline” or tapas is one of the principles of yoga. And so are truthfulness (satya) or integrity. And maybe it should not be seen as a struggle but rather a change in how I live my life. Free from things that do no good for my body.
So have I reached a conclusion given the epiphany that I had as I was suspended millions of feet high up in the air? Maybe not…and it seems that it has become a never-ending debate with myself – or maybe until the workshop actually starts that is.

flowing with grace

i am still definitely on a high from the 11 hours of yoga over the weekend. attended the amy ippoliti workshop in singapore and all i can say is that i was really amazing!

so i admit, there were a couple of asanas that i was not able to do. but just being there - with students who were so passionate about the practice was truly inspiring and uplifting.  it made me want to become a better yogini in training and really go deeper into my practice.  

i have learned that i have gone past the stage when yoga was just something to help me stay thin. it has transcended that and has risen to a much more higher sense of purpose.  more than the alignments and the asanas and the tools i have learned that i can take with me with my daily practice, i have perhaps learned the most important thing during the workshop...that what sets yoga apart from stretching, from pilates from any other form of exercise is that (and to quote amy), "yoga is a way of life". it does not end when we leave the mat.  it just in the mat where we practice, where we focus and meditate...but yoga is also what we do as we leave the mat.

and i realize just how much yoga has really transformed my life.  and it is this constant journey of transformation that i am looking forward to.  

i wish i could just take everything that i have experienced that weekend and just let everyone else experience...and yet i know words will not be enough to describe experiences like those. words simply will not give it enough credit.

and so despite this long blog i have written...i cannot find the right words to express and describe how wonderful and truly amazing it all was...

different state of consciousness

we did hip-openers last saturday for hatha 1 class and i have to say that my yoga experience this time was something quite extra ordinary. we focused on the 2nd chakra which is just around the abdomen area...this is where we repress our emotions and keeps the flow of energy in our body. so, focusing on this chakra and doing hip openers supposedly released repressed emotions. i was unmindful of that though during class. all i wanted was time to meditate and focus on my asanas. at the end of the class, the part where we do the final savasana and try to empty our mind, i found myself in a different state of consciousness. i do not have the words to describe it...it just felt really, really different. and it finally made sense why my yoga teachers would often say:"come back to yourself..." at the end of class or say "wiggle your toes", etc. it finally made sense. because it actually really felt like that. it was as if, you literally had to suck yourself back in to your own body. it felt weird but wildly exhilirating!
and yet, 2 days after that yoga class, i find myself in a rather pensive mood. like i was just about ready to burst into tears...and i was missing and reminiscing about my life in bangkok. i am not sure if that has a lot to do with all the "repressed" emotions that my yoga teacher was talking about... but that yoga class definitely left me hovering between intense sadness and bliss. not bad for releasing repressed emotions...

BIG thighs

this is so not funny...i think my thighs are getting big because of all these balancing acts in yoga practice.  like yesterday - we did ekapadas. and i swear i could feel my thighs growing an inch thicker during class itself!  maybe i'm being paranoid but i swear too that my pants (and shorts) were tighter than the last time i wore them! 

my thighs feel like solid blocks of brick (or wood) right now. and i seriously think they have increased in diameter significantly (although my husband would vehemently disagree to that!) - at least that's what i think and feel right now.

but what the heck...maybe i'll wake up tomorrow and realize that i was just imagining it all. or maybe my thighs have gotten a tad bigger...but that it does not really matter.  

it definitely will not stop me from going to yoga class again anyway.

missing ashtanga

since i moved to singapore 3 months ago, i have been to ashtanga class only 3 times. that's like once in a month!  a far cry from my at least 3 times ashtanga full series classes in absolute yoga in bangkok.  i have to say, i really miss it.  don't get me wrong - i love going to pure and the hatha classes i usually go to. but ashtanga?  i definitely miss.  and the schedule of classes here just don't allow me to go as often as i would want to.  apart from the fact that they don't really have the full 1.5 hour class but just the 1 hour condensed version.

i miss the fact that i always knew what to expect from an ashtanga classes.  the series was set so you know what asanas were going to follow. i miss being able to gauge how i was improving daily, weekly, monthly since the poses were the same. i miss the routine and the predictability of the poses in contrast to how my body feels or responds that day. 

and so while i am thankful and happy (as we chanted yesterday: "i am happy, i am happy, i am super most happy!") - i still miss it.  and until the shortage of ashtanga teachers is solved in pure yoga...well, i might just have to try self-practice one of these days (or NOT!)

inversions

i'm not sure yet if i love or hate inversions. it's kind of a tricky one really. i hate it cause i can never seem to do it! and it is soooo frustrating! honestly, i think i'm just being a sissy. i mean, tripods are a bit out of my league right now. but headstands i should be able to do quite easily. in fact, i can! but i'm just really too scared. yes, i'm a wimp! i have this fear of falling flat on my face or falling flat on my back. ouch! none of those options really appeal to me. our yoga teacher said that we should learn to fall. a lot like rolling with the punches.
yes, like so many aspects of life. the parallelism is disconcerting.
until then, i'll stick to the wall.

calling all yogis

i went to this hot flow class a couple of days back. and like all yoga classes, i looked forward to just one hour of quiet "me" time. the perfect escape from the hustle and bustle of singapore life.
and so, much to my irritation (yes, i can get irritated during yoga class...but there was a perfect excuse for it!), my "quiet" time was rudely violated by about 4 yacking and laughing girls in class! i am not kidding! what part about "no talking during class" did these girls not understand?!?! the sign was plastered all over the freakin' walls!!!!
ok, so i tried calming myself down...breathe in, breath out...concentrate on my ujjayi breathing...i kept "ohming" in my head hoping to relax and clear my mind. after all, it was all about concentration despite the external stresses and surroundings, right? and it did work...until i could hear them again - snickering, laughing, talking! my gosh...how come some people simply cannot shut up? and it went on like that for an hour. yes, despite my teacher's reminders that it was quiet time. *sigh* some people just don't get it.
i left the class and i was on the verge of really letting this get to me (which would totally contradict the whole yoga practice experience, right?) - until my husband (who has started to join me for my yoga practice) told me something quite unbelievable that it was actually hilarious...one of those girls actually answered a call on her cellphone during class! UNBELIEVABLE! haha. I mean...SERIOUSLY? i can only imagine how that conversation went..."hello? yes, i can't talk right now...i'm practicing yoga (heavy ujjayi breathing in the background)...yes...i'm meditating right now...ok, gotta go...savasana time!".
some people...i just don't get it sometimes...
so calling all yogis in training - please, shut up during yoga class!

how the love affair began

ok, i admit it - i started yoga out of my sheer desire to lose weight. that was about it. to say that there was a higher reason for it (like meditation, health and peace of mind) would be pushing it. hence my flirtation with yoga started that way. nothing born out of a greater purpose but a purpose nonetheless. i started going to the newly opened bikram yoga in makati more than 4 years ago (i think). i loved it! it was hot, it was intense and i felt like a lost 5 pounds in just a week! so, naturally i loved it! never mind the fact that 90% of that was most probably water-weight. the pounds went and i was happy! so i kept going for a month or so until i suddenly realized that my schedule got too busy and that the studio fees were really expensive - lousy excuses actually. in hindsight, i might have just been too lazy or had other priorities in mind (like happy hour drinking).
so i stopped going. and yet like an irresistible and persistent affair, my desire for yoga kept on coming back. i never acted on it though. it was just there - persistent and yet still ignored.
that was until i relocated to bangkok for work when i seriously started to reconsider yoga. well, for one, there was nothing to do really. none of my friends had the habit of drinking after work until the wee hours of the morning on a weekday - so my week nights were mostly spent either working late or trying to find something worthwhile to do. and so, like an epiphany i knew what i could do! i signed up for absolute yoga in bangkok, which was conveniently just a 5-minute walk from the apartment. since the only kind of yoga i knew then was only hot yoga, i naturally went for that.
and i went 2 times a week
and then 3 times a week
and then almost every day
for a month
for 3 months
for 6 months
for a year.
i was officially hooked.
i was in love.
and i swear i could have gone every single day! for a whole day!
and i seriously considered teaching yoga as my sole profession!
yes, like a newly found love, i was deeply passionate about it and addicted to it.
and that's how it was. and that's how it still is.
2 years into it and i still love it. maybe even more so now.
and as i have moved towards different types of yoga: ashtanga (my personal favorite), vinyasa and hatha, i am continuously falling more and more in love with it. still discovering so many things about it. each experience different. it has gone way beyond the simple desire to lose weight. i don't know when and how that happened - but i'm glad it did.
but i am far from being a true yogini. i am sure i do not act like one, nor do i think like one. i am far from being a controlled and balance being (despite the fact that control and balance is at the core of yoga). yes, i still have this urge to wack noisy people in class. and during the 5 minute meditation, i cannot seem to stop thinking about that irritating person at work - very "un-yoga-like". but hey, i'm learning!
and so despite the seemingly "evil thoughts" and "negative vibes", i still practice and remain faithful to the practice. it takes time after all.
and so i like to call myself a "yogini in training". and this is my journal.